AlabasterSpoon: ur blog is still talking about the VMA that was so last summer
xPinkBishie: I know, a lot has happened, the move, the trip to Boston
xPinkBishie: My crappy experience at the security checkpoint at the airport
xPinkBishie: but two things, I haven’t had any inspiration to write and I hate blogging at work, so I wait till I get home but I don’t have my laptop yet
AlabasterSpoon: yeh you don’t tell me any of the good stuff anymore
xPinkBishie: Heh
AlabasterSpoon: did u get strip searched?
xPinkBishie: no
xPinkBishie: This woman felt the need to embarass me in front of the rest of the line
xPinkBishie: I was more surprised by her attempt to embarass me than anything else
xPinkBishie: Apparently you have to expose ALL liquids that you have in your carry on
AlabasterSpoon: or did they just feel you up?
xPinkBishie: I took out my toothpaste and deodrant
xPinkBishie: I had to step aside and she loudly announced, “PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH YOUR BAG WHILE I SEARCH IT”
AlabasterSpoon: and what did you forget?
xPinkBishie: I forgot to take out a small, travel size bottle of saline solution for my contacts
xPinkBishie: She pulls out the small travel box that I had it in (I completely forgot about it) and then proceeds to show it to her coworkers to scoff at my stupidity for not listening to directions
xPinkBishie: Then she said, “SO YOU DON’T LOOK LIKE THAT CRAZY, YELLING MAN WE HAD HERE EARLIER. BE SURE TO SHOW US ALL YOUR LIQUIDS”
xPinkBishie: Then she threw out my toothpaste and my deodorant
AlabasterSpoon: the bitch!
AlabasterSpoon: were they to big?
xPinkBishie: Yeah, because when I take over airplanes I plan to disorientate everyone with a cloud of powdery fresh $1.99 Suave deodarant

The next time I’m subjected to such freakishly, ridiculous displays of homeland security I’ll be sure to empty my bladder in a cup and hand it over. I mean, if we’re going to be really serious about exposing all liquids.