I stopped celebrating my 4th of July anniversary of my now defunct long-term relationship and am approaching the two year anniversary of Shibooya in 4 days. It’s hard to describe where I’ve been with this blog and where it’s going. My interests are confusing and varied- I’ve dabbled in crafts, complained about college, reviewed films and novels, cooked and baked and believed myself to be a photographer. My posts are nonsensical, personal, trite babble but I love it anyway.

Even after months of not updating and at the point of expiration, I couldn’t bring myself to let the domain go. There isn’t really too much here worth salvaging- but I want to keep it just the same.

These anniversaries have left me wondering about all these changes and where it’s taken me. I’m currently working full time at large university and avoiding graduate school for as along as possible. I have zero desire to return to school to pursue a Masters degree. There’s really no good reason for this - my job gives me the opportunity to get a free education, I could take an online program, I have money for school put away. I have every conceivable reason to continue my education. I just don’t want to. I acknowledge that sounds unbelievably spoiled and selfish- there are thousands of struggling students dealing with loans and wanting to pursue their goals. I have every resource at my disposal and am simply to lazy to register for the G.R.E. I did, in fact, study for the G.R.E. for several weeks. It didn’t work out. It is boring, it is silly and it wastes my time. For me, education has turned into a big, fat waste of time.

1. Elwood Thirsts, 2. Us, 3. Boats in St. Pete, 4. Best Salad EVAR

So, I spend my free time enjoying my free time. I read. I see old friends. I go out to dinner. I drink white wine. I shop. I watch films. I bond with my 6 month old niece. I cook and bake often. It may sound a little dull, hollow and domestic, but I like it. I like taking my dog to the dog park. I like falling in love again. I like not planning for things that may not happen. I like my life a lot right now.

I’m discovering new things about myself: Public speaking used to make me nervous but now I find it invigorating. I’m not afraid to admit what inspires me, what harms me and what I want. I believe in spirituality. I’m much more optimistic than I thought I was. I am very aware of what my limitations are. I don’t care what people think anymore.

For the past couple of weeks, I’ve been working on Goddess MC, my business oriented blog that certainly has a niche: Athena’s Home Novelty products and sex– a topic I find myself very comfortable discussing. I’m excited about pursuing this venture and a bit apprehensive about the workload. To be successful in direct sales, one has to be aggressive, organized and resourceful. I’m way too polite to be a pushy salesperson, I’m not very tidy and while I’m resourceful, I’m very, very lazy. But these are all hurdles I’m willing to tackle and overcome. I agree strongly with Athena’s philosophy of empowerment and sex education. I’m feeling pretty confident and I’m feeling pretty content.

I feel like I’m finally starting to have fun again.

Related posts:

1. A New Direction Hello there! If you are new here, you might want...